I believe in kids.
This may come as a surprise, but I strive for excellence. I am not a perfectionist, but I believe that if you do not give something your all, you might as well not bother getting involved in it at all. Why do things half way? Why try for a B instead of an A? Why settle for a 3.5 instead of shooting for a 4.0?
When did it become all right to be average? To be mediocre? When did a C become acceptable? Why do the people who get straight A's get ridiculed? Why do those who devote themselves to doing the best they can end up with nothing more than a nod?
Now, before the jocks of the world yell at me, I do not mean this in just a grades-based sort of way. I mean excellence in anything that you set out to do. If you want to play a sport, give it your all. If you want straight A's, give it your all. If you want to write, give it your all.
I would, however, like to focus this particular discussion (at least at first) on a single facet: spelling and grammar.
My fellow SE++ers snicker, as they know exactly what drove me to write about this particular topic. (No, it's not you, Chuck, you know I have a deep affection for you and your spelling habits.)
What I am, my friends, is sick and tired of hearing about people getting off easy for bad spelling and bad grammar. I don't even mean teachers letting these kids get away with it. I mean the language itself being changed to accommodate kids who are just too plain lazy to learn how to spell properly.
"It's too hard to remember," they whine. "Everyone spells it THAT way so I'm going to keep spelling it THAT way (even if it's wrong)." "I've only ever seen it spelled that way." "More people spell it this way than that way." "This spelling makes more sense to me."
Fuck you all.
I and countless other non-native English speakers have worked our asses off to get good at your fucking language…and meanwhile you're going to sit there and whine about how "hard" it is for you to learn when you are surrounded by it every moment of your waking life.
Fuck you and your mediocrity.
When did it become okay to be "mediocre?" When did these standards lower to accommodate people who are simply too fucking lazy to do the work? I blame the baby boomers. My parents were part of that generation, as are most individuals who are now in their 50s and 60s. You had shit handed to you on a silver platter and now you can't stand to see your kids suffer.
When your kid gets a D, you don't yell at your kid. You yell at the teacher for being a rotten teacher. You're happy with just a C because it's considered "average" and you're happy that your kid is just "average." You don't let your kids do the International Baccalaureate program because it's "too hard" and "too stressful."
Never mind the benefits of pushing your child to strive for excellence. Never mind the benefits of putting them to the test when they still live under your own roof, where you are able to hold them up when they fall or guide them when they need it. No, never mind any of it. Let's just say "it's too hard for my C-student, I don't want them to stress themselves out." Lower those expectations, mom and dad, because heaven forbid your child face a single goddamn challenge in his or her life while you are around to help them through it.
Yes, some kids are not A students and they are excellent in their own ways, be it as an artist or an athlete or something else. I respect that. I have mountains of respect for kids who are well-rounded, able to excel in more than one pigeon-holed area of expertise. I myself am very capable of singling out an individual's strengths. It's why I am such a fantastic person to come to when you need an ego boost.
Honest to god, I hate the idea of lowering expectations just to accommodate an unwillingness to challenge oneself. The English language has been mastered by people long before this generation. Why now do you change it and simplify it? What's wrong with this generation, now, that makes it impossible for THEM to learn how to spell properly when all generations before it seem to lack that problem?
Blame the internet. Blame computers. Blame television. Blame ADHD. Blame whatever the fuck you want, but placing blame doesn't change the fact that all you are doing is making it okay for kids to just stop trying. You are making it okay for them not to do the work. You are making them think that the second they face an obstacle, it's okay to ignore it instead of overcome it, because they're going to go ahead and believe that, eventually, someone will remove it for them.
If they suck at spelling, fix the fact that they suck at spelling. Don't fix the language they're trying to spell in. Challenge them. Bring them up to the standard, bring them up past it, don't bring the standard down.
The kids can do it. The only reason they think they can't is because everyone is too busy making excuses for them. Push them, and kids will always fucking surprise you. Parents, do you really have that little faith in your own ability to raise a child that you don't think they can handle something like the IB? Sure they'll bitch and complain that it's hard, but that's why you're there. You're supposed to tell them they can do it, that they have the ability to do it. You're there to show them that yes, it's hard, but when they finish it, they will finish it as a stronger person, better prepared to face what comes next (in the case of the IB, that would be college).
One day, life will throw something nasty in their face, and you won't be there to help them through it. Do you really want that kind of situation to be the first time they feel like they can't take something on? Help them now, support them now through their challenges so that when you're gone, when they're out of the nest, they are better prepared, better armed to tackle life's bullshit.
Huh. Talk about a passionate and preachy digression. My apologies. I know I sound elitist in those previous paragraphs, but this is what I will tell anyone who thinks their kid "can't hack it." I believe in your kids. Why don't you? But back to the topic.
Sure, spelling is a small facet of a much larger issue, but it alone is a stellar example of the kind of thing I'm talking about. No one asks for A's. It's okay to be second instead of first.
As long as you gave your best, sure, you can be proud of that. But you better swear that you did in fact do your best, that you did in fact give it your all, before you look at that silver medal with pride.
Saying that you did your best, that you did everything you could, is a pretty far cry from actually doing it.
Nothing, nothing worth having ever comes easy. I don't want to think about what the next generation will be like if they believe otherwise.
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